Sunday, 23 June 2013

No Rainbows Today!



Over the last few days I have been full of cold and feeling rather sorry for myself. When I got back from church oldest son was quietly revising for his last exam tomorrow, I’d managed to get a friend to look after youngest son for a couple of hours so I was all set to curl up on the sofa under a blanket with a lemsip and a movie.

“Notting Hill” – I decided as I drove home, a bit of romance and Hugh Grant – perfect. Only when I checked I realised I don’t have it on DVD, I had a video copy but I got rid of all my videos a while ago, with a view to downsizing and moving to a smaller house.

I choose "The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel" instead – no Hugh Grant but I reasoned it would remind me that I wasn’t too old for romance and adventure, even if I do still have to wait until the boys have left home I’ve hopefully got plenty of years ahead of me!

So I was merrily planning a blog post with this theme while enjoying the film when the phone rang. I paused the DVD.

Youngest son wanted to come home, he’d been fed but wanted his own space. In return he promised to leave me alone in peace.

I snuggled back under the blanket and pressed play, I watched another half an hour or so with maybe one or two minor interruptions. 

There was an almighty thunderstorm, which I stopped the film to watch. The drive had turned into a river. Still pondering today's blog I thought maybe I could write about thunder and lightning and the first time I wasn’t scared of a storm – I’ve filed that away for another day now – it would make a good post.

The storm passed and I continued the film.

Suddenly there was a heated argument in the hall between the boys ending with the ominous sound of breaking glass, a lot of crying and a shout of “mum!”

Thankfully it wasn’t quite as dramatic as the noise suggested, a football had been kicked in the porch and a window was smashed. No injuries, no blood and that particular pane of glass had been cracked for years.

More shouting followed, this time from me as I sent both boys upstairs and set about clearing the debris.

I’m fortunate really, I have two boys and we’ve never had many serious incidents like this.

However glass had shattered EVERYWHERE, mostly on the gravel in front of the porch but some shards had reached and scratched the car, bits were under the car and when I investigated further I found fragments on the roof too!

Carefully I collected every piece as the rain started to fall again. It was a sunshine and showers sort of a day. I looked up half hoping a see a rainbow, a promise from God that this too would pass and everything would be alright.

But there were no rainbows for me today and actually for once I didn’t mind. I didn’t need a new promise, I’m holding on to all the old ones and today they are enough to keep me going.

At church this morning we had a chance to share something we are thankful for and I shared twice! Firstly for the kitchen floor and hot and cold running water. Secondly this week a little girl said hello to me in the supermarket followed by telling her mum, “she comes into to school to tell us bible stories.” It’s lovely to get this reaction to our Open the Book team assemblies.

Once I started counting my blessings I remembered more. 

A walk with friends, my growing veg patch, a compliment and an insurance cheque in the post.

Despite feeling rotten, having a half-finished kitchen and having a funeral song in the service for the second week running which has made me cry, I know God is holding me tightly and won’t let go. Rainbow or no rainbow.

Another blessing today was that my friend’s husband came round to board up the window, it meant another interruption to my afternoon but eventually I watched the Marigold Hotel to the end in peace.

Here’s one of the great quotes from the film…

“Everything will be all right in the end... if it's not all right then it's not yet the end.”

Sounds good to me!

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